Watch this short video from The Lady Musgrave Trust to understand the common red flags. When you can spot them, you can make changes to keep yourself safe.
Learn more about how to identify when things can become unhealthy in relationships, disguised as 'love'.
Sometimes abuse can be subtle to start with, increasing over time or gradually. It's important to understand the different types of abuse and the different forms it can take. The below are some examples. If your experience doesn't fit these exactly, it doesn't mean it's not abuse, access support.
Direct assaults on the body and often the most visible form of abuse.
Examples can include:
Punching, slapping, kicking, hitting, biting, pushing, burning/scalding, strangling, pinning someone down, excessive physical force/pressure. Physical assault may also include using weapons or objects.
Coercive control is ongoing repeated pattern of behaviour, includes physical and non-physical behaviours that scares, hurts, humiliates, harasses, monitors or takes away another person's freedom or controls their day-to-day activities.
Examples can include:
Intimidation, isolation from family or friends, humiliation, threats, periods of silence/sulking, limited or no right to your own privacy, depriving basic needs, controlling finances, degrading a partner/family member.
Sexual violence can happen to anyone.
Examples include:
Pressuring, tricking, threatening or forcing someone into any type of sexual activity. Including making rules or demands when someone must have sex with them or the types of sexual acts they must perform. Taking photos or videos of someone naked or engaging in sexual activity without their consent or with their consent then using them to threaten or humiliate them.
Emotional abuse is a type of abuse that involves the use of words and actions to control, manipulate, and intimidate another person. Emotional abuse can be just as harmful as physical abuse, and it can have a devastating impact on a person's mental and emotional health.
Examples include:
Name calling, degrading, humiliating, gaslighting, manipulation, bullying, put downs, being verbally abusive, making untrue allegations, disrespecting and making someone feel scared or bad about themselves.
Stalking behaviour can be very threatening, harmful and dangerous. It involves a persistent course of conduct or actions by a person which are intended to maintain contact with or use power and control over another person.
Examples include:
Regularly following someone and/or spying on partner or family member, repeatedly turning up uninvited to their home or work, checking someone’s internet use, email, or other electronic communication, sending unwanted gifts, hanging around somewhere they know the person often visits, posting threatening or personal information about someone on public internet forums
partner/family member, persistently attempting unwanted contact by whatever means available.
Financial abuse is sometimes called economic abuse and it often involves someone using money in ways that can hurt you.
Financial abuse can also include controlling or stopping you from getting a job or forcing you to get loans you don't want. It can also include someone controlling where the money you earn goes, taking away choice and freedom about how you interact with your finances.
Examples can include:
Giving a 'set allowance' only allowing joint bank accounts, refusing to include you in financial decisions, building up debts, spending/taking money without consent, taking out loans without consent, not allowing the purchase of necessities, refusing or limiting access to finances.
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